1
When I heard Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson were guest preachers at a nearby
church, I decided to go there and check them out in person.

As soon as I sat down, Reverend Sharpton came over to me. I don't know why,
maybe it was because I was the only white person in the church?
He laid his hands on my shoulder and said: "By the will of Jesus the Lord
Almighty, and the will of God, you will walk today."
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I told him I was not paralyzed.

Then Jesse Jackson came by and said: "By the Grace of God, and his Son
Jesus, the Lord Almighty, you will walk today."

Again, I said that there is nothing wrong with me. After the sermon I
stepped outside and lo and behold ---

My car was gone !

Amen







2
A woman goes to her gynecologist.

"What seems to be the problem?" asked her doctor.

"Something is terribly wrong, I keep finding postage stamps from Costa Rica in my Vagina."

The doctor had a look, then chuckled before she said

"Those aren't postage stamps my dear, they're the stickers off the bananas"
1
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
1
My sister-in-law was teaching Sunday school class. The topic for the day: Easter Sunday and the 
resurrection of Christ.

“What did Jesus do on this day?” she asked. There was no response, 
so she gave her students a hint: 
“It starts with the letter R.”

One boy blurted, “Recycle!”
1
A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job. So each one goes into the woods, finds 
a bear, and attempts to convert it. Later, they all get together. The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his first Communion.”

“I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and preached God’s holy Word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.”

They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast. “Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn’t have started wit
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h the 
circumcision.”
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Jokeland.org is an open source collection of jokes, riddles, and funny memes. See our sister site at Jokeland.ca. ALL net proceeds from these sites will be donated to the MS Society.

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